I love instagram.
There I said it.
I love it!
My feed is full of awesome small farms, families living almost completely off the grid, moms of youngins, and loads of homeschool for littles. Oh and a few friends, and yes, I mean a few.
I love to fantasize that I live on a small farm somewhere with loads of nature, animals, and kids who are almost always dirty.
The reason I do not follow my friends is that i suffer from FOMO.
Fear Of Missing Out.
I already suffered a small amount from FOMO before becoming a mom, but now I am fully aware of how deep it really goes. It was really embarrassing for me to admit this a few months in. I felt like I shouldn’t have FOMO since I was so lucky and blessed to have this baby. And I am! I am completely blessed and totally lucky to be a mom.
But this does not mean I don’t have room for other feelings, like FOMO.
Transitioning to motherhood can mean major shifts in friendships, and sometimes, it is solely because you do not have as much time to spend together. It’s not because you are a bad friend or they are, but you have an almost all consuming responsibility right now that was not there before. There is no way to truly prepare your relationships for this type of shift.
The more I talk about my FOMO, the more I discover that SO MANY MOMS suffer from this! Dare I say it’s normal!
For me, I have found that if I don’t see my friends hanging out without me, I am able to really be happy when I see them and cherish our limited time together. It is not beneficial for me to know that their lives totally went on without me-and definitely not through social media!
In reality, everyone’s lives do go on. I am the one who became a mom. My life changed. And sometimes, theirs don’t. But who am I to harbor salty feelings towards them for just being themselves and living their lives!
Eventually I hope the FOMO shrinks and I can look at all of my friends having a ball without me and feel nothing but love and happiness for them. For now, while I adjust to this new normal, I will stay in my fantasy and bliss. Because teething is already hard enough, I don’t need constant FOMO as well!