Coming to you from my warm bed in my warm robe next to my sleeping baby.
Yes, I am exhausted. I would love to join her in her sleep.
But I can’t. I cant sleep because the dishes are dirty and there are toys everywhere and no one made lunch and there’s laundry. And I need to shower. And we have people coming over later. And I need to work-so so much work.
But I am so tired.
I know you mamas know what kind of tired I am talking about. Not the “ man I need another cup of coffee tired”. I am the “my brain won’t stop and sleep only comes in spurts(thank you top 2 teeth) and I will never get it all done and this is making my body respond” tired.
Ya, that kind. Sound familiar?
I know I am not alone in this. Almost every single mama friend I have-and because of this amazing community through our show and Instagram, I have A LOT of mama friends!-has expressed or regularly expresses that they are experiencing this special kind of tired. If this is you, you are in good company.
So what fixes this kind of tired?
Like I said, I am coming to you from my bed, in my robe, maxed out and ready to tap out.
So much of the tired we carry as mamas is the tired from pressure, from responsibilities, and more than anything, the fear.
Here are my fears today:
my house will look like the crazy mess it does now later on when people come over, and I will feel stressed or overwhelmed instead of present with friends.
I will never actually sleep again, I’ll just be tired forever and then die-I realize this is less rational than the first but hey I am entitled to my own thoughts and fears!
the work won’t get done and I won’t get paid and we will have to eat potatoes and beans all month-also less rational but still real.
I really am not equipped for this all and I am not learning fast enough.
My daughter and husband will not have all they need from me because I feel too tired to give.
I would say these are the top fears. Now if we really wanted to, we could sift through these and find 100 more fears- the little ones that paralyze you because fear of moving is greater than fear of what happens if I just stay here.
Now can we talk about something positive?
This month, I am reading a book called “One Thousand Gifts” by Ann Voskamp. I don;t know if you’ve heard of it or maybe you’ve even read it before, but if you are looking for something to shake the fatigue of the body and soul, give this book a holla.
This book is all about gratitude. Gratitude in the big cosmos, gratitude that I have hands to wash these dishes, gratitude that I have a family to wash dishes for. Gratitude-big, small, tiny, infinite gratitude.
On these days of daunting exhaustion that I can’t seem to see past, I have to return to gratitude. Like Ann, I list the things I am grateful for and am energized:
boxes of mint chocolate cookies
friends who pick up when you call
that my daughter still takes 2 naps and I can breathe
My challenge to you today is this: if you feel exhausted, drained, and like tapping out(remember, you are not crazy if you do and you definitely aren’t alone here!) take a moment or several and get grateful. Not a forced gratitude of things you aren’t truly grateful for, but a personal gratitude of things you are. This can be anything, and you can start anywhere.
But take a breathe.
And make a list.
And feel a bit of refreshing for your mind and soul.
And when you’re done, take a quick nap.
I’m right there with you.