I know the word vagina can seems so...blunt.
But hey, once you think of pushing a human out I can't think of a single word that is better to use-and more magical!
Postpartum care is no game and honestly, there are so so so many blogs and lists of what you should do to take care of you pelvic floor, your stretch marks, your sore non-existent abs.
This is a post about postpartum care for your heart.
In my experience, the first several weeks after baby were pretty blissful. Yes, I was exhausted. Yes, my vajayjay was killing me in the beginning. Yes, pooping was a dreaded task(and a painful one). But being with your newborn baby…there’s nothing like it. I have never been as happy as I was those first 8 weeks.
And then something shifted.
As my daughter grew more, and I healed more, there was this voice of expectation in the back of my head that started to grow. I was letting my house go and feeling perfectly fine about it until the shift. All of the sudden I was hearing “if you can be up this long, the dishes should be done” and “if you are still awake, then you could go clean up the living room”.
The pressure was on.
And no, not a single person was saying this to me. Not one. It was all coming from this idea that I was supposed to go back to having it all together again, now that I could comfortably walk for 20 minutes and sitting down didn’t hurt.
Here’s the thing: things will NEVER be the way they were before.
And this my friend, is one of the hardest realities us new moms have to face.
Your house may never be as clean as it once was. Your hair may never be as beautifully conditioned. You might not even be showering regularly anymore. Heck some days I was brushing my teeth at noon because that’s when I finally remembered to!
All of this is, all of this new messiness or lack of control, is not only normal, it is OK.
It’s ok that you now care more about your baby than your house. It’s ok that you look a mess and your baby is cute as ever in their perfect outfit and hair. Its ok!
It’s also important to remember: this is temporary.
Your ENTIRE life just changed now that you are a mom and you WILL find your way! It might not be in week 8 or week 20 or year 2 but you will find it-and whatever happens in the meantime is ok!
I desperately needed someone to tell me this when the shift began, and I hope you hear me loud and clear, that you are doing the dang thing mama. You are growing and changing with your baby and whatever you are feeling is ok.
If I could tell myself anything about the shift in hindsight, it would be “hey unrealistic expectations, you can shut-up now”.
For your vagina, you should definitely use a few drops of lavender oil, frankincense, and tea tree oil on your upper inner leg, not your vagina. It will soothe, clean, and relieve. Also rest. Oh my goodness rest.
May the Lord be with your vagina. And hopefully you get some time to take care of your heart a bit too.